


Meeting in the Moonlight

by OhanaHoku



Series: The Raven-Haired Warrior, A Raven-Haired Child [11]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: BAMF Merlin (Merlin), Child Abuse, Child Soldiers, Childhood Trauma, Conditioning, Epic Friendship, Friendship, Gen, Hurt Merlin (Merlin), Male Friendship, Merlin Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Merlin Needs a Hug (Merlin), PTSD, Past Child Abuse, Protective Gwaine (Merlin), Protective Merlin (Merlin), gwaine is a good friend, merlin has issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:47:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26690896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OhanaHoku/pseuds/OhanaHoku
Summary: Merlin ponders what Kilgharrah said, and Gwaine appears unexpectedly to talk.
Relationships: Gwaine & Merlin (Merlin), Merlin & Mordred (Merlin)
Series: The Raven-Haired Warrior, A Raven-Haired Child [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1764406
Comments: 29
Kudos: 177





	Meeting in the Moonlight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MediocreServant_aka_SirSimsalot](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MediocreServant_aka_SirSimsalot/gifts).



> Okay, I know the title is similar to the last part, but I just couldn't think of a better title for this one, so oh well. Sorry for the long absence, guys. My last two weeks have been Hectic with a capital H. My family seems determined to undermine my productivity. XD Eh, they mean well. <3 This installment is gifted to MediocreServant_aka_SirSimsalot in thanks for their support! We're starting to see some BAMF Merlin now, I hope you enjoy it! ;D
> 
> TW: Slight Violence, Themes of Violence

Feeling restless after the dragon flew away, Merlin pulled the dagger from his boot, tossing it in the air and catching it as it came back down.

If telling Arthur was what caused Kilgharrah to sense the movement of fate, was it possible that it was a good thing instead of a bad thing? What if keeping that secret was what kept Merlin from saving Arthur in the vision he saw? What if now that he knew, Merlin could save him?

The warlock frowned as he balanced the dagger on his finger, the tip of the blade sharp against his skin, but not piercing it.

If that were true, though, would that mean that the only way to save Arthur would not be with magic, but with the skills he learned in Cenred's care?

Scowling, Merlin let the blade's handle fall into his palm, looking down at his moonlit reflection in the polished metal. He didn't want to be that monster again. Merlin didn't want to kill people. True, he had already killed people to protect Arthur; However, he'd never done so in the brutal, violent way he'd learned as a child.

He tried to make death as quick and painless as possible when it came to that. There was a big difference between throwing people back with magic and plunging a dagger into their heart.

Still, if it came to it, Merlin may have to resort to such methods to protect Arthur.

The thought made him sick to his stomach, but he knew that if it came down to it, he wouldn't hesitate. If it came to a choice between saving Arthur or letting him die, there was no choice. He would protect his king every time.

Even if it meant becoming that person again. Even if it meant killing Mordred. Not that Merlin would murder the young boy, but should he try to kill Arthur, Merlin would do what was necessary.

He would kill Mordred.

"Merlin, mate."

Startled by the sudden voice, Merlin stood, spinning around quickly to throw the dagger in his hand. It was only at the last second that he realized the voice belonged to Gwaine, the servant just barely managing to adjust his aim in time.

***** ***** ***** ***** *****

Gwaine froze as the dagger flew by him and embedded itself into a tree with a dull thud, holding his hands up in surrender. “Whoa there, it’s just me.” He said, looking over at Merlin, who was quickly turning much paler in the moonlight.

“Gwaine, I-” Merlin swallowed thickly, looking ready to faint. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to- I didn’t realize-”

Gwaine shut the apology down quickly. “No worries, Merlin.” He pulled the dagger from the tree with a slight grunt, the metal embedded deeper than he’d thought. “Your aim is so horrible, you couldn’t hit the broadside of a wagon.” He told him, grinning as he walked forward to hand the dagger back to him. 

Merlin’s hand twitched at his side, but he hesitated for a moment before taking the weapon back. “What, um, what are you doing out here?” Merlin asked, looking down at the blade rather than meeting Gwaine’s gaze.

“Looking for you. Gaius said you were doing some gathering for him while the moon was out.” Gwaine told him, eyeing him for a moment before sighing. “I’m sure you don’t want to talk about it, Merlin. But you should know that this doesn’t change things for me. You didn’t treat me any differently when I told you I was a noble, and I’m not going to treat you any differently because of the things you did as a child.”

Merlin looked up at him from under his lashes, his gaze wavering between hope and doubt before it sparked with anger. “Don’t speak of my past as if you know everything! You know next to nothing about the things I’ve done!” He shouted, slashing his hand through the air, the blade thankfully held in his other hand. “Nothing!” He repeated, chest heaving, the boy suddenly looking close to tears.

“Merlin,” Gwaine spoke his name softly to fend off the tears before they came. “It’s true, I don’t know. And I won’t until you feel able to tell me.” He slowly moved closer, feeling gratified when Merlin didn’t flinch away from the hand he placed on his shoulder. “And perhaps I say this in ignorance, but I don’t think there’s anything in your stories that could make me change my mind about you, Merlin. You’ve a kind heart, and nothing Cenred made you do could change that.”

The servant eyed him dubiously but didn’t bother to argue. Gwaine took that as a sign that their conversation had come to a close and patted Merlin’s shoulder fondly. “I’ll let you get back to gathering your herbs. Night.” He told him, smiling at him before turning to walk away as Merlin echoed his last word softly.   
  
Only once Gwaine was a fair distance from the clearing, did the knight stop, his back against a tree, and his eyes wide. He reached up to touch his neck gently, remembering the barely-there graze of the dagger’s smooth handle he'd felt as it flew past him.

The slightest shift to the left and Gwaine's throat would have been cleanly slit, killing him almost instantly.

Despite having heard Merlin's story, it was still a shock to witness and nearly be a victim of what the young man could do.

Regardless of that, though, Gwaine believed what he said. He knew that Merlin was a good person, even if his past was less than innocent. So no matter what, he was going to stand by his friend.

_ Though, _ he mused, thinking of how Merlin had thrown the dagger without hesitation when Gwaine startled him,  _ maybe I should make sure to stand where he can see me. _

**Author's Note:**

> Word Count - 974. Heh heh heh. *cackles evilly* I hope you guys enjoyed this part, because it's one of my favorites so far. In content at least. Quality-wise, I think some of the others are better. We are definitely going to see some more of Merlin in action, don't worry. And, of course, more of Gwaine being the awesome friend he is. The next part may be either Gaius and Merlin, or Gwen and Arthur. I'm not sure, yet, but we'll see. Let me know what you guys think! I'd love to hear any of your hopes, or suggestions for this story! (Can't guaruntee to make them happen- I have a pretty firm idea where this is going already- but I loving reading what types of ideas my writing inspires. :) Thanks for reading guys, til next time! ;D
> 
> P.S. I'm posting fic recommendations on [tumblr](https://ohanahoku-ao3.tumblr.com/), go check it out. :P


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